Saturday, December 15, 2012

An Afterthought: Note to Suicidal Killers


Dear Shootists:

I've been kind of wondering, lately, why none of you ever has shot up a gun show.  Shooting up a gun show has several distinct advantages:
  1. You don't even have to bring your own guns!  Loaded guns and plenty of ammo will be readily available, so you can save yourself the time and expense of stocking up.
  2. You don't have to bother killing yourself, because somebody else is sure to do it.  It's even better than "death by cop."
  3. The death toll will be far greater than anything you could accomplish by yourself.  When the "self-defenders" see other people shooting at you, they'll start shooting at them, creating a righteous right-wing daisy chain of murderous intent and consequences.  You could leave hundreds of bodies behind.  Wow!
If you happen to survive, please don't tell the cops it was my idea.  This is just free speech, y'know?  Surely, the first amendment counts for as much as the second.  If you happen to be on Twitter, please tweet these observations (not recommendations) to other crazies, and if the general public gets the message too, that's fine.

Once again, America, fuck the NRA!

No comments: