Conspiracy Theory

Since I don't use Twitter, I'm a bit behind on my conspiracy theories, so I'm not sure what's out there regarding Saturday's bombing in Manhattan.  Just in case there aren't enough, I figured it might be amusing to formulate my own.

Ever hear of Tannerite?  Hardly anybody has, except for people who operate shooting ranges, where it is used to create exploding targets that add an extra thrill for those who enjoy shooting things.  As it happens, Tannerite was the explosive used in the pressure cooker bomb that injured 29 pedestrians on 23rd Street in Chelsea.  Who would think of using Tannerite, other than NRA operatives working to advance the presidential ambitions of Donald J. Tr*mp?

It makes perfect sense, especially given the enthusiastic response to the bombing from Tr*mp himself, lapdog Chris Christie, and others.  Clearly, they suggest, the bombing calls for expanding the police state and heightened persecution of American Muslims!

Like all conspiracy theories, mine is based on the flimsiest of evidence.  Well, who cares?  Please do your best to spread it far and wide!

Later:
Now that we know the bombs were planted by a Muslim chicken-fryer from New Jersey, do I apologize?  Of course not!  In the true spirit of conspiracy theorists, I double down!

Obviously, the guy the police shot and arrested was contacted and mock-radicalized by agents of the NRA, who provided him with the Tannerite and persuaded him to bomb the Chelsea area, which is full of Democrat hipsters, and even has the same name as Hillary's daughter!  This new information only serves to strengthen my original argument!  Could it be any more clear?

I ask anybody who already started spreading my theory to get back on Twitter and make any necessary clarifications.  This is no longer a theory!  Now, it's a fact!

Another Republican Debate (yawn)

I caught last night's Republican debate.  I meant to skip it, but somehow I didn't.

Jeb Bush overcame his intrinsic good manners and respect for rules by ignoring the moderators and continuing a spirited attack on Tr*mp that went well beyond his "time limit."  I guess he meant to demonstrate he's really not a wussy.  Did it work?  Well, it didn't hurt.  Many of the candidates participated in ganging up on Tr*mp, and to me the Donald appeared slightly shaken.

Rubio and Cruz apparently believe the contest is between the two of them, and may have done each other some damage, but probably not enough to matter even in the short run.  Both Rubio and Cruz supporters will believe their man "won."

Chris Christie tried an amusing new tactic: disparaging Congress, as represented by Rubio and Cruz.  Given the public's low regard for Congress, the new tactic may have been effective.  We'll see.

Rand Paul was sounding a lot more libertarian than in previous debates, which was refreshing.  Ben Carson did damage control, Carly Fiorina suggested privatizing national security, and John Kasich made no particular impression at all.

And, oh yeah, nobody likes Obama.